Interview with Duchess Of Sussex

Meghan Speaks to Tamzen Temple.

With a chance to tell her side of the story,  Meghan Princess of Success speaks.

TT: Princess, nice to see you

MM: You too Tamzen Temple. you’re looking spectacular as usual.

TT: I know.  So the move.  Whose idea was it?

MM: Well I made Harry believe it was his but it was all mine.

TT: Wow.  That’s putting it straight.  Why?

MM:  There is no privacy being a royal and no career opportunities, royals aren’t allowed to work  and I hate the dark… I mean shadows and I’m living in about six of them…. Harry, William, Charlotte, the Queen… etcetera etcetera etcetera

TT: The King and I??  Anywho.


MM:  You couldn’t understand what it is like Tamzen Temple.  From day one I’ve been scrutinised, judged and compared to all sorts of people from Wallace Simpson to Yoko.  I am me. Not them. I want to be compared to me me me. And Catherine… perfect freaking Catherine.  F%^$  she’s so freaking perfect and does it so well. The outfits, on point, the motherly duty thing, the loyal wife.  Harry’s like 6th in line so I’ll never have a chance

TT: OK.  Did it occur to you when you signed up to be a royal that it would be difficult.  I mean you must have heard of them before, you must have realised the sacrifice to be made?  It’s kindof like I’m a Celebrity get me out of here.  YOu know that you would have been thrown in a snake pit, been eaten alive by the hounds, all aspects of your life crawled over like jungle spiders?

MM:  Well yeah I thought I knew but it’s different.  I prepared by watching episodes of The Crown, The King’s Speech, Princess Diaries, Coming to America, I thought that would be like my life but in reverse like coming to the UK.

TT:  Are you really that crazy?

MM:  I have been suffering anxiety, stress.

TT: Yes I bet you have but you seem to have adjusted like I mean, you want out of the spotlight and already you have a Disney opportunity, clothing brand label sorted, trademarked the Sussex brand. Isn’t that kind of a sign of someone with extreme confidence to take on the Firm and do it your way?

MM:  YUP.  Look the whole inlaw thing where you may not agree but have to just go along with them.    Us yanks do it different.  Like we have guns and we have movies and La La land and Trump.  Different values, ideologies.     Nothing is real and then suddenly things are real because you’re told they are.  I’ve been pretending and now it’s all real, I think.

TT:  Uhhh yeah. Moving on.  Don’t you feel you’re taking Harry away from the masses?

MM: He’s fine with it.  In fact I have hired him as my promoter.  He’s already got meetings lined up with Quentin Tarantino … Kill Bill, or William… sequal.  He’s all for that.  Hollywood will embrace us. I mean Canada will embrace us.  They will love me me me…

TT: Let’s hope.  NOW… Lets talk about the other elephant in the room…. There is the other problem in your life.

MM:  Family again.  Yes my sister is a very hollow vase.

TT: To right. Is there anything you’d like to say to her?

MM:  I would love to tell her to shut the fuck up.  Shut your pie hole, your mouth, your trap, chops, kisser, your cavity that words exit,  gob, just shut up and find something new to talk about.  Like seriously havn’t you profited enough off me.  You are distubed to relish the attention that the media is paying you  for.

TT:  WOW you are angry.

MM: I’m just fucking over everyone else getting the attention.

TT:  I’ll have to agree with your there.  That sis of yours is bonkers.

MM:  I have no idea what that means and don’t care to.

TT: Well I’m getting the wind up signal so thanks for taking the time with me to put things straight.    May I take a selfie with you?

MM:  One hundred bucks you can. It’s my going rate.

TT: See ya.

SO there.  Have you got any extra insider infor on Meghan?? Scroll down and let me know.


2 thoughts on “Duchess Meghan Speaks all things Sussex

  1. She’s to blind to see her fucked up father caused the last freinzy!!!!!! Didn’t he do the same right before the wedding??? Wow, and what about that mom with the nose ring? All the best, I never wanted the marraiage, Why would he marry an American actor, because he tired of all the perfect matches with money and class.

  2. Wowsers. Nose ring. What a rad mum. I think the nose ring is the least of her worries….
    Very sad her family keep making random appearances and statements with her every move. Sad for her but also seems a bit of disrespect to make the decision without consult. I’m lucky my royal heritage doesn’t have as many rules. Peace from the Temple.

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